Peter Hucker
2005-10-18 17:43:00 UTC
Birds have methods of eating which are all their own and are designed to
befuddle their owners. Somehow they must have a way of communicating them to
each other, since many birds use these techniques with their humans. Here
are some common eating and drinking rules of etiquette, strictly from a
birds point of view.
Food Bowl Etiquette
The Foot Strainer
Place one foot on the side of the food bowl, using the other foot as a
utensil. Grab a footfull of food and lift. Smaller seeds and pieces of food
will fall to the floor, making a funny noise. Eat the one or two pieces
which remain in the foot. Repeat until the bowl is empty.
The Dainty Selector
Approach the fresh dish of food. Daintily select pieces of food and gently
drop to the floor of the cage until only a few desired pieces of food remain
in the bowl. Proceed to eat. When done, call for more food.
The Dieter
One at a time, hold each piece of fruit, veggie or pasta in the foot. Take
one bite and drop the remainder on the floor. This ensures that there will
be room for treats and other delicacies later.
The Dried Fruit Gourmet
Choose pieces of dried fruit. Carefully place them in the water bowl. Return
later, after they have plumped up. Then remove from the bowl, taste and drop
on the floor.
The Shoveler
Approach a full dish of food. Bury the beak in the bowl and with a quick
snap of the neck, sweep the food sideways out of the dish. Use short quick
strokes to cover most of the cage bottom with pretty patterns of food. If
feeling energetic, shovel harder to decorate the walls and floor outside of
the cage. This method helps convince the pet owner that a different kind of
food is preferred.
The 20 foot Fling
Dip the foot in a food dish and grab a large footfull of goodies. Close the
foot into a ball around the items, raise the foot and throw as far as
possible. This technique not only gets to the walls and floors, but reaches
much of the furniture as well.
The Grate Houdini
From time to time drop morsels of favorite foods on the cage floor. Let them
remain there while they age to the proper potency. When ready, climb down to
the cage floor and sample the delicacies. Many pet owners have placed grates
in the bottom of the cage. To thwart this maneuver, just stretch a leg
through the grate to get at the prize. Most birds have legs long enough to
reach the tray below the grate. If the owner changes the cage papers daily,
begin dropping pieces of food just after the change so that the food has at
least a few hours to ripen.
The Butter or Sauce Scraper
This maneuver is to foil the human who coats a piece of undesirable food
with butter, sauce or something else that birds really love. Just hold the
piece of food in the foot and use the beak to skim off the good tasting part
leaving the unwanted portion untouched.
Pack a Lunch
Tuck seeds, pellets or other choice items among the feathers and under the
wings. It messes up the human's measurements of how much is eaten and
puzzles them when they give you a shower.
Water Sports
The Artist
For birds with an artistic flair and a good sense of color. Break off a
piece of dyed wood from a favorite toy and place in the water dish. From
time to time, return to the dish and mix. When the water has turned a
satisfactory color, call for the pet owner to admire the creation and
replace the water. Begin a new artistic work.
The Dunker
Carefully select a choice piece of food from the food dish. Items like
pellets, cheerios or birdie bread are best. Dip in the water bowl until
thoroughly soaked. Sample the moist delicacy and decide that it doesn't
taste as good as expected. Leave the item in the water bowl and start
complaining about the messy water.
The Water Bottle Trick
For those birds lucky enough to have a water bottle. Select the proper size
seed and wedge it into the water bottle tip. This keeps the water bottle
mechanism open and creates a nice waterfall effect. Experienced birds can
also use the beak or a toe to achieve the same effect.
Eating at the Dinner Table
The Plate Stomp
Explore the various foods available on the table, before making a selection.
Just approach each bowl or plate and walk through it, making sure to pass
through each item on the plate. Foods with sauces and dressings are
especially great. They stick to the feet and allow the flavors to mix with
other food items. The messy feet also discourage the pet owner from picking
a bird up from the table.
The Shoulder Trick
Select a piece of food which has a sauce (such as pasta) or a juicy item
(such as a piece of tomato). Holding the food in the beak, as fast as
possible climb up the arm of a human to the shoulder. Proceed to eat the
messy food, dropping sauce or juice on the human's clothes. When done, drop
the remainder and wipe the beak on a still clean portion of the item of
clothing. A true expert bird can perfect the 'Squeegie Trick'. Hold a piece
of pasta with sauce in the foot and bite off the end. Pull the pasta through
the foot to get another bit, while at the same time forcing the sauce to
come off on the foot. Place this foot on the human's shoulder when it has
become sufficiently covered with sauce. Climb down the arm to get another
piece of food.
The Floor Caper
After selecting items from a dinner plate, take a few bites and fling the
remainder to the floor. To throw the food further, fling the food from a
human's shoulder. If the human becomes annoyed, placate it by offering it a
bit of the food or saying something cute and looking innocent.
Eat to Get a Hug
Grab all the garlic you can find - garlic bread, salad dressing, etc. Then
give the human a kiss. The human will give you hugs and scratches - anything
to avoid getting another odorous, garlic breathe kiss. Also effective is the
'Pepper Kiss'. A kiss after eating hot red peppers or jalopenos will
definitely get a human's attention.
--
http://www.petersparrots.com http://www.insanevideoclips.com http://www.petersphotos.com
The latest ploy to drive the insurgents out of Iraq is to send in a team of Louisiana Special Forces.
Billy Bob, Bubba, Boo, Scooter, and Cooter are being sent in with the following information:
1. The limit is two.
2. The season ended last weekend.
3. They taste just like chicken.
4. They don't like beer, pickup trucks, or country music
5. Some are queer.
That should just about do it, don't you think?
befuddle their owners. Somehow they must have a way of communicating them to
each other, since many birds use these techniques with their humans. Here
are some common eating and drinking rules of etiquette, strictly from a
birds point of view.
Food Bowl Etiquette
The Foot Strainer
Place one foot on the side of the food bowl, using the other foot as a
utensil. Grab a footfull of food and lift. Smaller seeds and pieces of food
will fall to the floor, making a funny noise. Eat the one or two pieces
which remain in the foot. Repeat until the bowl is empty.
The Dainty Selector
Approach the fresh dish of food. Daintily select pieces of food and gently
drop to the floor of the cage until only a few desired pieces of food remain
in the bowl. Proceed to eat. When done, call for more food.
The Dieter
One at a time, hold each piece of fruit, veggie or pasta in the foot. Take
one bite and drop the remainder on the floor. This ensures that there will
be room for treats and other delicacies later.
The Dried Fruit Gourmet
Choose pieces of dried fruit. Carefully place them in the water bowl. Return
later, after they have plumped up. Then remove from the bowl, taste and drop
on the floor.
The Shoveler
Approach a full dish of food. Bury the beak in the bowl and with a quick
snap of the neck, sweep the food sideways out of the dish. Use short quick
strokes to cover most of the cage bottom with pretty patterns of food. If
feeling energetic, shovel harder to decorate the walls and floor outside of
the cage. This method helps convince the pet owner that a different kind of
food is preferred.
The 20 foot Fling
Dip the foot in a food dish and grab a large footfull of goodies. Close the
foot into a ball around the items, raise the foot and throw as far as
possible. This technique not only gets to the walls and floors, but reaches
much of the furniture as well.
The Grate Houdini
From time to time drop morsels of favorite foods on the cage floor. Let them
remain there while they age to the proper potency. When ready, climb down to
the cage floor and sample the delicacies. Many pet owners have placed grates
in the bottom of the cage. To thwart this maneuver, just stretch a leg
through the grate to get at the prize. Most birds have legs long enough to
reach the tray below the grate. If the owner changes the cage papers daily,
begin dropping pieces of food just after the change so that the food has at
least a few hours to ripen.
The Butter or Sauce Scraper
This maneuver is to foil the human who coats a piece of undesirable food
with butter, sauce or something else that birds really love. Just hold the
piece of food in the foot and use the beak to skim off the good tasting part
leaving the unwanted portion untouched.
Pack a Lunch
Tuck seeds, pellets or other choice items among the feathers and under the
wings. It messes up the human's measurements of how much is eaten and
puzzles them when they give you a shower.
Water Sports
The Artist
For birds with an artistic flair and a good sense of color. Break off a
piece of dyed wood from a favorite toy and place in the water dish. From
time to time, return to the dish and mix. When the water has turned a
satisfactory color, call for the pet owner to admire the creation and
replace the water. Begin a new artistic work.
The Dunker
Carefully select a choice piece of food from the food dish. Items like
pellets, cheerios or birdie bread are best. Dip in the water bowl until
thoroughly soaked. Sample the moist delicacy and decide that it doesn't
taste as good as expected. Leave the item in the water bowl and start
complaining about the messy water.
The Water Bottle Trick
For those birds lucky enough to have a water bottle. Select the proper size
seed and wedge it into the water bottle tip. This keeps the water bottle
mechanism open and creates a nice waterfall effect. Experienced birds can
also use the beak or a toe to achieve the same effect.
Eating at the Dinner Table
The Plate Stomp
Explore the various foods available on the table, before making a selection.
Just approach each bowl or plate and walk through it, making sure to pass
through each item on the plate. Foods with sauces and dressings are
especially great. They stick to the feet and allow the flavors to mix with
other food items. The messy feet also discourage the pet owner from picking
a bird up from the table.
The Shoulder Trick
Select a piece of food which has a sauce (such as pasta) or a juicy item
(such as a piece of tomato). Holding the food in the beak, as fast as
possible climb up the arm of a human to the shoulder. Proceed to eat the
messy food, dropping sauce or juice on the human's clothes. When done, drop
the remainder and wipe the beak on a still clean portion of the item of
clothing. A true expert bird can perfect the 'Squeegie Trick'. Hold a piece
of pasta with sauce in the foot and bite off the end. Pull the pasta through
the foot to get another bit, while at the same time forcing the sauce to
come off on the foot. Place this foot on the human's shoulder when it has
become sufficiently covered with sauce. Climb down the arm to get another
piece of food.
The Floor Caper
After selecting items from a dinner plate, take a few bites and fling the
remainder to the floor. To throw the food further, fling the food from a
human's shoulder. If the human becomes annoyed, placate it by offering it a
bit of the food or saying something cute and looking innocent.
Eat to Get a Hug
Grab all the garlic you can find - garlic bread, salad dressing, etc. Then
give the human a kiss. The human will give you hugs and scratches - anything
to avoid getting another odorous, garlic breathe kiss. Also effective is the
'Pepper Kiss'. A kiss after eating hot red peppers or jalopenos will
definitely get a human's attention.
--
http://www.petersparrots.com http://www.insanevideoclips.com http://www.petersphotos.com
The latest ploy to drive the insurgents out of Iraq is to send in a team of Louisiana Special Forces.
Billy Bob, Bubba, Boo, Scooter, and Cooter are being sent in with the following information:
1. The limit is two.
2. The season ended last weekend.
3. They taste just like chicken.
4. They don't like beer, pickup trucks, or country music
5. Some are queer.
That should just about do it, don't you think?